Wonderful Mental Freaks
by PinkSprayBottle
Summary: Dramione! Sixth Year Christmas Ball and Draco wants Hermione, and she's starting to doubt on whether she hates him or not.


Our story begins with around Christmastime at Hogwarts. Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy sat on opposite sides of the Great Hall, chattering away to their housemates.

Hermione was rarely ever without her nose in a book, so her friends tried to take advantage of the priceless moment. She took a large bite of treacle tart and made a foul face in disgust, which was responded to by Harry sticking his tongue out at her and helping himself to one.

Ginny snorted as she watched, and stealthily stole the flaky pie tart from Harry's plate; as he was too busy animatedly chatting to Ron about whatever Quidditch team he was going on about this time.

Hermione rolled her eyes and peered at the giant Christmas Tree that Hagrid had brought in. "Don't you reckon the tree should be decorated?" she asked, while frowning at the stray from tradition.

"Of course they'll decorate it, Hermione. It's _Christmas_." Ron said, as if that explained everything.

Hermione sighed exasperatedly and then raised it quite suddenly. "Wait! Didn't McGonagall say something about a Christmas _Ball_?" she asked, the mere though making her stomach churn. Her Yule Ball experience didn't go too well two years ago, besides Viktor, who was a perfect gentleman and her Bulgarian pen-pal.

"_Ball?!_" Lavender Brown suddenly appeared, flanked by Parvati and Padma, all three wearing matching red dresses with fluffy white trim. "Did I hear correctly? We're having a _ball?_"

Hermione blanched, and cringed at her fatal mistake. "Sorry, Lav. I said _hall_. As in, 'Didn't McGonagall decorate the _hall_?' I wish though." She sympathized as she lied.

Lavender's brightened face suddenly fell, looking gloomy. "Oh. Me too." She flounced away without her usual spring in her step, and then came back round to giggle to Ron. "We could've gone together, Won-Won. With matching outfits!" she giggled hysterically before squeezing his shoulders and blowing him a kiss.

"Nice save, 'Mione. She would've caught you, and…" Ginny trailed off, shuddering. Harry smiled and cleared his throat, drawing attention away from the fact he was maybe possibly staring at her.

Ron looked at Lavender, and looked down at his plate. "She's getting a little… clingy." He whispered, looking around to make sure she was gone.

Harry raised his eyebrows at him, "Mate, just break up with her." He suggested, and Ginny piped up.

"Really, Ron. Harry's right. She's getting on my nerves as well, imagine what she would do when the… you know is announced." She tried to avoid anymore mishaps with a certain someone's annoying girlfriend. "When Dean was a bit much for me to handle, I told him that was it, we're done. Do the same for her."

Ron shook his head. "I can't get rid of her! She's so… I don't know. I just can't." he sighed before eating his pain in chocolate éclairs.

Ginny rose, along with Hermione, who also left her seat, but not before a slight turn of the head found what she was looking for, or rather, who. Draco Malfoy sat at with Zabini, Crabbe, Goyle, Nott, and Pansy Parkinson.

Hermione turned again; it was her little secret, after all. She watched Draco sometimes, and she kind of liked it when he wasn't frowning. No! She wasn't allowed to like…Malfoy. But the very thought of his name brought joy and the want to giggle like Lavender.

Ginny tilted her head as she struggled to understand what was up with her studious bookworm friend. "Hermione? Come on, McGonagall just announced the ball."

Hermione was rather confused. She was just there. Why hadn't she heard it? "She did? Oh, I wasn't listening." She said absentmindedly.

Ginny frowned tapped her head, and Hermione's bubble popped, and she jumped, because Ginny was tapping on her HEAD! She shook her head; she was too busy thinking about a certain Slytherin.

Meanwhile, Draco was suffering. Pansy squealed about every five seconds. "Drakey, what color should I wear? Pink? Or blue? Or silver? That might compliment your eyes, right?"

Zabini snorted. "Good luck, _Drakey_."

"Who are you taking then?" he asked bitterly. He knew perfectly well who he wanted to take, but Pansy already had claimed him.

He wanted Granger. She was beautiful, with her curly masses of hair and chocolate mocha eyes. Draco loved how she was so smart, and the more he heard her hate him, the more in love he fell with her.

Zabini thought and grinned devilishly. "Brown. She's not bad, is she?" he said, watching her outside the Hall, talking to the Patil twins, her Santa hat swinging back and forth and her feet wobbling in her heels.

Pansy let out a hyena-like giggle. "You want _that piece of trash_? She's Weasel's pick, Blaise!" she shrieked shrilly, and Zabini groaned.

"How about Patil? The Raven. She's smart; I'm guessing, and reasonably attractive." Blaise offered and Millicent Bulstrode slid into an empty seat next to Blaise and attempted to flutter her eyelashes, with disastrous results.

"Are you talking about me, Blaisey? I would love to go with you…" she hinted as she scooched in closer.

Blaise stood up and shook his head. "Not happening, Mandy."

"Millicent!"

"Whatever." And with that Blaise casually strolled to where the three girls were gossiping, and Padma turned very red as he asked her to the ball.

"So…?" he asked.

Padma hesitated for a moment, and then slapped him, her many bangles whipping his cheek. "I have a boyfriend, you idiot!"

Blaise stomped back, passing his House table and going to the Ravenclaws. He looked all around, trying to suit his taste, and then saw her. Her flowing blonde hair, and her clear blue eyes, wandering around curiously. She sat alone, but she seemed happy. Blaise walked up to her and cleared his throat before earning dirty looks from her housemates.

She looked up at him with wide eyes, and his mouth faltered. "Er, Lovegood. Sorry, Luna, is it? Do you… er, you see, the… go to the ball with me!" he practically shouted. Ginny, who was close to her table rushed up to Luna and drew her wand menacingly.

"Whatever game you're trying to do, Zabini, it won't _work_." Ginny said in a threatening voice, but was held back by Hermione, even though she was really suspicious as well.

Luna raised and held up her hand gently. "Don't worry, Ginny, Hermione. It's okay," she said, before smiling up at Blaise. "I would be honored, Blaise."

Blaise was taken by surprise, and almost walked away. Then he stopped and turned. "Did you say _you would be honored_?" he asked, not believing it. Luna nodded, and blinked, confused. "That's, it's… I'll pick you up at eight, yeah?"

"Sure. Don't worry about matching, Blaise. I'm not like that." Luna advised before Ginny and Hermione pulled her away, bombarding her with questions.

Draco shook his head. "I'm appalled, Blaise."

"That I went for Luna? Because she doesn't care that I'm Slytherin, and I don't care that she's not. I just… I don't want any prejudice during this Ball, and I'm happy with her, Draco. So, you can shut your ferrety face, you prat!" he said, and Draco feigned being hurt.

"That you didn't tell me about your little crush. You obviously liked her for some time now?"

"That's not your business, Malfoy." Blaise rose and left.

Draco was thinking, and thinking hard. If Blaise could ask someone from another house, why couldn't he? And it would be a certain bushy-haired bookworm he would ask, if he had the nerve and worked up the courage.

Pansy was spreading rumors about Blaise and Luna, rumors about a secret relationship, the possibility of Luna being a Death Eater, and Blaise not being loyal to Slytherin. The whole hall was at a dull roar, all discussing the shocking 'scandal' that had just happened.

"Drakey, tell them what he said to you!" Pansy demanded as her pasty-faced and burly Slytherin group of girls stood around her.

Draco ignored her and pushed past her, trying to find Blaise. He was found near the lake, throwing pebbles, attempting to make them skip across the lake. "Blaise. I need to talk to you."

Blaise shook his head. "Come to lecture me, Draco?" he asked, kicking a large rock, where it made a large splash. "Not in the mood, mate."

"Not a lecture. I need advice." Draco said nervously.

"I already told you, just throw Pansy into the lake, nobody will notice. Problem solved."

"IlikeGrangerbutidontknowwhyanditsdrivingmecrazy!"

"Hold on, mate, Granger? Did you see her at the Yule Ball? When she's smiling? She's gorgeous." Blaise said, whistling as he failed at skipping a rock for the about the fiftieth time.

Draco glared at him. "I know."

"Don't be bitter, you got to share. But I have my Luna. Good luck prying Granger from Potter and Weasley."

Draco panicked. "Potter and Weasley? They like her? But… Potter's got Weaslette, and Weasley's got Brown!"

"They're always protective, mate. In other words, you're screwed."

"What do I do?!"

"Run _very_ quickly, Draco. My words of advice."

Draco groaned in frustration and flung a rock at the lack, which was intercepted by a large tentacle. "I've always got the Squid, I s'pose."

Blaise snorted. "Have fun putting _that_ thing in a dress."

Draco slugged him and sat in silence over his misfortune. "Should I ask her?"

"Wait until after, otherwise Pansy will have your head on a platter before New Year's." Blaise said seriously.

Draco loudly groaned before realizing he was missing half of Potions! Snape would be livid when he got back. "Argggh! Potions! Bye, Blaise! Find a dress for the squid!" and he ran off.

Hermione, who was stuck in a fascinating book about wizard dictators who were banished to Azkaban, was also running late.

She skidded across the dungeon floor and collided into Draco. She coughed and got up, when Draco accidentally offered his hand. Then she gaped and wiped her hand quickly on her robes. "Malfoy!"

"Granger!" he replied jokingly.

"What was _that_? Oh, never mind that, I'm late, and so are you, Malfoy!" she rushed inside, and cringed as Snape glared at her. "_LATE_, Granger!" he said as she took her seat. "Detention, Granger. And sit up front, here." He motioned towards a table near his desk, and Hermione sat down glumly right as Draco casually strolled in.

"Malfoy. Detention. Explain." He said, and Draco smirked.

"I was telling Blaise exactly how to put a dress on the squid." He replied, and Pansy tittered like was the world's greatest comedian, and batted her lashes at him as scribbled hearts on her parchment with fuchsia colored ink.

"Join Granger. Instructions are on the board." Snape said, and Draco obeyed, overjoyed at his sudden luck, although Hermione looked as if Snape had it in for her. She made a sour face and moved to the very end of the table.

Draco's heart sunk. But he had to pretend he didn't care, as if he was glad, even. Not really though. Hermione started chopping snake fangs to grind in the large mortar in front of Draco. The instructions looked simple enough, and Draco had a knack for Potions.

"Alright, Granger. We will do this work, and that's it. Done." He said, squeezing the juice out of a horned slug.

She gave him a dirty look and reached over to pull to mortar over to her side. Draco let her have her own space; he knew if he touched her, his head would be a potato for a month or something ghastly like that.

She grinded slowly, the pestle thumping down and shaking the whole table every time she pounded.

"Use more pressure at the bottom, not force at the top. And if you do it faster, there's more impact." He explained showing her how to do it. She frowned for a second, and then relaxed.

"Like this?" she pounded again, and Draco covered her small hand with his, attempting to show her.

She wasn't really that mad. Just a little freaked out. Why was he being so nice? It was…unnatural.

He suddenly let go, he realized he shouldn't have been holding her hand that way, but regretted it almost instantly.

"Malfoy, I think this is good enough?" she asked.

"My name is Draco. And that's perfect." He said, emptying the contents into the water-filled cauldron. He mumbled, "Avares Bolatem." With a wrist flick and rounded motion the water was boiling, and then he added the slug juice.

"But it hasn't boiled yet!" Hermione said, drawing her wand to scrap the potion. Besides, a tiny part of her wanted Draco to help her with grinding again.

"That spell I just cast? A little efficiency spell to bring water to a boil. Breeze in Potions." He said, and Hermione was open-mouthed.

She had a burning desire to ask him more, but simply nodded and resumed her work. "We're almost making a Cheer Potion!" she blurted. Draco frowned.

"A what? Snape wouldn't do that, especially on the last day before break. It's too planned out."

"I said almost. If you add two drops of peppermint oil and five tentacula leaves instead of the crushed shrivelfig, it'll turn this into a Cheer Potion. Just the smell of it can instill cheer in you! We _have_ to do that! Snape would cheer up, Mal- sorry, Draco!"

Draco smiled when she said his name, but thankfully she would think it was the Snape thing. "You've swallowed a textbook, Hermione, as usual. But yes, we should make a Cheer Potion."

Hermione bounced on the balls of her feet as Draco added the extra ingredients. "Wait, did you just call me…Hermione?"

"That's your name, isn't it?" Draco asked skeptically.

Hermione grinned. "It is! That _is_ my name!" she said, the Cheer Potion starting to affect her.

Draco backed away and she giggled. "Sniff the potion, Draco! It smells like sunshine…" she swooned. "I feel like dancing, Draco! Can you play something?"

Draco wanted to dance with her _very_ badly, but he shook his head and waited for it to wear off.

"Draco Malfoy, pick me up!" she declared.

Draco's eyes widened. "Excuse me?" he said, slightly terrified. "You're out of it, Hermione."

"I want a piggyback! And a lollipop! Does Hogwarts have a pep squad? I think I should join!" she babbled nonsense.

"There is no pep squad, Hermione! I think I messed the potion up!" Draco walked around, running his hands through his platinum locks, concentrating. Hermione was now a happy babbling idiot.

"Nonononononono! We need a pep squad… ahh! Pretty lights!" then she collapsed into his arms.

He started to worry that she was concussed or something like that, and then she giggled, similar to Pansy. People were starting to notice.

"Draco!" she exclaimed happily, and then fell to silence, before piping up, "Take me to the place where your hurt goes away!" Snape approached the pair and sighed.

"I don't want to know why you idiots did this or how, but take her to the Hospital Wing!" he said, pointing out the door, and then he caught a whiff of the cauldron.

"Professor, don't do-!" he was too late. Snape had a wide grin stretching across his face.

"I am Severus Snape, Emperor of the Penguins!" he cried, his fist in the air. Draco ran out and carried Hermione through the hallways carefully.

"Am I your wife?" Hermione giggled halfway through, and Draco almost dropped her. "Don't drop your wife, Draco! You're holding me bridal style…" she trailed off, and he thought she fell asleep. She was nodding off when he entered the Hospital Wing.

"What happened?" Madam Pomfrey sighed.

"Cheer Potion went wrong."

"Severus wanted a Cheer… oh, never mind, set her down on that bed, please." Madam Pomfrey grabbed some potion reversal antidote and poured some into a glass. Hermione drank it in one gulp and sat up brightly. "That was positively-!" then she groaned and fell forward. "Disgusting!"

Draco breathed a sigh of relief and fell into the chair next to the bed, exhausted.

"What happened to me?" Hermione asked, lightly touching her head. "Where am I? Oh, right. How did I get here?"

Draco coughed awkwardly. "Err, I levitated you." He lied, but Hermione glared. "Okay, fine. I had to carry you."

Hermione blinked twice and almost smiled. Then full out burst out laughing, and almost rolled onto op Draco, who shoved her off playfully.

Hermione smiled and sat up. "Did it work on Snape?" she asked, and Draco looked away.

"He…um, might've said something about him being the penguin emperor or something…" Draco smiled, for the first time in years, he felt happy, and it wasn't the Cheer Potion.

"Hey, Hermione?" Draco asked tentatively.

"Hmmm?" she muttered, now observing the antidote label. "I think I might be able to make this, but it requires some dangerous ingredients that I'm sure you don't get at Hogsmeade and-oh! What if it backfires, I can't take that risk-" Draco cut her off.

"Come to the ball with me?"

Hermione sputtered and started blindly flailing around until Draco threw a glass of water on her. She breathed heavily, her hair sopping wet, and dripping on the sheets.

"I'm sorry, what?" she coughed.

"No, forget it, what was I thinking?" Draco mumbled, looking down with his hands in his robe pockets.

"No, I think that's sweet!" Hermione exclaimed. "Draco, of course I'll… ugh! What am I_ thinking_?!"

Draco frowned. "_What?_"

Hermione gulped. "I'm sorry. Besides, you have Pansy, right?"

Draco's face fell, and his heart settled in his stomach. "I don't _want_ that ugly pug!" he argued. "I want _you_!"

"_Excuse me?_" Hermione gaped. "You HATE me, Malfoy!"

"Yeah, sure!" he shouted. Hermione waved her wand and did a _Muffliato _spell around them.

"I don't get it, Malfoy! We are ENEMIES! I _hate_ you! And the feeling must be _mutual_, Malfoy!"

"Stop calling me that! I don't hate you at ALL! In fact, I might _love_ you! But that doesn't matter to _you_!"

"Wait…you, you love me?" Hermione whispered.

Draco sighed. "I don't want to talk about this." He left the Hospital Wing, and Hermione went after him, flinging herself at the Malfoy heir.

"Draco! Come back! I don't hate you!" she shouted, drawing attention from several pictures.

"Get off me, you mental woman!" he shook her off and then she sighed.

"I would love to come to the ball with you, Draco. But what about Pansy?" she asked worriedly.

Draco smiled. "I was taking that mental freak to the Ball, but I want to take this one." He teased, and Hermione shoved him.

"Because I'm the best mental freak around?" she asked.

"Yes, pretty much."


End file.
